What happened to the days of brief and interesting messages with a question or two? This is a real message I received this morning on OkCupid. It makes me miss the days of complaining about a message that only contained ;-) or said "hello".
The message...
1.) I recently read The Bell Jar, which has had a peculiar influence on how I approached writing.
2.) Have you begun learning sitar yet? I was interested in learning guitar for only a few songs, most of them George Harrison tunes, and from what I remember he seemed to be interested in that instrument also. I have trouble isolating my interests.
3.) Donatello is the best ninja turtle.
4.) What was the earliest production (in your life) that you acted in? If you don't remember/are unsure, what had the biggest impact on you? What impressed you into wanting to act? Or was it just always a part of you, no discovery needed?
5.) Are you a tennis elitist?
6.) What inspired the founding of your organization?
7.) Sort of related to 4, what was it that brought you to theater specifically? I'm a film actor, and I'm soon to be auditioning for my first musical. Hoping to branch out a bit, get some synergy going.
8.) Did you finish Firefly yet? Are you a sci-fi geek, Whedon fangirl? What brought it on?
9.) TELL ME HOW TO BE HAPPY?
10.) I didn't notice the crepes thing the first time I read your profile. Sweet.
11.) Are you a hopeless romantic or am I just taking a weird subtext from the films you chose?
12.) Lafayette > Eric > Bill > Sam > Jason. Your ranking of the True Blood boys is important to me, especially if you're throwing out reckless TMNT favoritism like that ;P
13.) I was hired as an angel for a Gaga show in Milwaukee. Does this make me cool? I think it does. I wish I had a better picture of me in costume :(
14.) Have you seen Hedwig and the Angry Inch?
15.) I skipped over this last time because I had to correct you in regard to whom the best and coolest Ninja Turtle is, but I was once the Red Power Ranger when I wanted to be the Green, so, I feel that pain.
Friday, December 16, 2011
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Why Tropical Bars Do Not Equal Dating Success
Almost a year later… single. I’ve given up on trying to date. Trying seems ridiculous. I’ve been so focused on my non-profit, and it’s doing truly marvelous. My social life is not where I’d like it to be. It is what it is. Honestly, I just don’t interact with many single 20-somethings. If you noticed I said single, it’s because I did. I have fabulous 20-something guy friends who aren’t single, and I blame them for my being single. Don’t you guys have friends you could introduce me to? Maybe it’s the true downside of suburbia, or Wisconsin. I’ve officially cancelled my account on the last dating website. It was a happy moment. All of the people I somehow facebook friended from my on-line dating experience, I’m still friends with. I did meet up with one person, but I’ll save that story for later.
Sally has a boyfriend now. Strangely enough he messaged me on a dating website a while before he met Sally. I never messaged him back. I sent him a cake with Sally to apologize for my apparent insensitivity for a lack of response. I think it all ended well… he ended up with a great girl, my bestie. If I didn’t think I had enough in common with someone, I didn’t respond to their message. I just wanted to save everyone time. I had enough times where I messaged someone, for them to stop messaging back a week later.
Sally is of no help in setting me up with guys. When she worked at a previous job she was going to set me up with a co-worker’s son. That didn’t happen. Then she was going to set me up with her boyfriend at the time’s best friend (who she ended up disliking – what?), and then she broke up with the guy. When she started seeing her boyfriend now, she was supposed to go on a date with another co-worker’s son. The strange thing was that this guy was going to take her on a date that I thoroughly would’ve appreciated – Cuban restaurant followed by going to the museum. Amazing, right? She had made the date with museum guy, and then really hit it off with her current boyfriend. The idea was she was going to break the date, and then suggest he go out with me instead. That was never going to work. Instead of our well-planned, and somewhat scripted idea, she avoided getting back in contact with him. Moral of the story is I need to get some co-workers…
From here we move on to Sally trying to get me going out more. I’m not going to lie; I’m not a “go out” kind of girl. I’d rather find a place where I can just sit and chat with people. Ideally, be able to hear my own thoughts. Sally’s new favorite hangout is on a side of town I’m not too fond of, particularly because I care about my own safety. We have ditched going downtown. That was a debacle. The theme of this place is tropical, and they make drinks with umbrellas and in volcano bowls which is why I’m convinced she drags me there. Sally set up a Girl’s Night Out. This ended up being Sally, myself, and her friend Abby.
At this point we’ve ditched the idea of wearing sparkly things. I had on a black dress with embroidery, black leggings (hello Wisconsin), and open-toed heels (hello idiot, it’s cold and you have a bad ankle!). By the time we made it in, I couldn’t feel my feet since they were so covered in snow. It was quite a walk. We were there for a while. Sally and I ordered a pizza and inhaled it in our foodie fashion. We looked around and started to notice that there were quite a few women in this bar. Abby starts google searching on her phone, and announces that we are in fact in a lesbian bar. I point out to Sally that this is not helping out the fact that I am single. She suggests we go to another location where they have artwork all over. I ask if there are more guys there. She guarantees that there are a lot more guys there.
We get back in the car, and at this point I switch to winter boots. Practicality over cuteness. Plus, I really do hate wearing heals. We get to the bar, walk in, and it’s empty except for a bartender and a handful of women sitting by the window. Sally, Abby, and I sit around a table asking each other questions, and then they teach me how to play pool. It was a fun girls’ night out, but not a successful dating night out.
Now that I’m back, you all can expect to see more posts. They might be more sporadic though because interesting things have to happen. The next post is planned and will cover other Sally adventures, and my thoughts of how the dating scene would be better in other cities. Feel free to comment. Feel free to set me up on a date.
-SJ
Sally has a boyfriend now. Strangely enough he messaged me on a dating website a while before he met Sally. I never messaged him back. I sent him a cake with Sally to apologize for my apparent insensitivity for a lack of response. I think it all ended well… he ended up with a great girl, my bestie. If I didn’t think I had enough in common with someone, I didn’t respond to their message. I just wanted to save everyone time. I had enough times where I messaged someone, for them to stop messaging back a week later.
Sally is of no help in setting me up with guys. When she worked at a previous job she was going to set me up with a co-worker’s son. That didn’t happen. Then she was going to set me up with her boyfriend at the time’s best friend (who she ended up disliking – what?), and then she broke up with the guy. When she started seeing her boyfriend now, she was supposed to go on a date with another co-worker’s son. The strange thing was that this guy was going to take her on a date that I thoroughly would’ve appreciated – Cuban restaurant followed by going to the museum. Amazing, right? She had made the date with museum guy, and then really hit it off with her current boyfriend. The idea was she was going to break the date, and then suggest he go out with me instead. That was never going to work. Instead of our well-planned, and somewhat scripted idea, she avoided getting back in contact with him. Moral of the story is I need to get some co-workers…
From here we move on to Sally trying to get me going out more. I’m not going to lie; I’m not a “go out” kind of girl. I’d rather find a place where I can just sit and chat with people. Ideally, be able to hear my own thoughts. Sally’s new favorite hangout is on a side of town I’m not too fond of, particularly because I care about my own safety. We have ditched going downtown. That was a debacle. The theme of this place is tropical, and they make drinks with umbrellas and in volcano bowls which is why I’m convinced she drags me there. Sally set up a Girl’s Night Out. This ended up being Sally, myself, and her friend Abby.
At this point we’ve ditched the idea of wearing sparkly things. I had on a black dress with embroidery, black leggings (hello Wisconsin), and open-toed heels (hello idiot, it’s cold and you have a bad ankle!). By the time we made it in, I couldn’t feel my feet since they were so covered in snow. It was quite a walk. We were there for a while. Sally and I ordered a pizza and inhaled it in our foodie fashion. We looked around and started to notice that there were quite a few women in this bar. Abby starts google searching on her phone, and announces that we are in fact in a lesbian bar. I point out to Sally that this is not helping out the fact that I am single. She suggests we go to another location where they have artwork all over. I ask if there are more guys there. She guarantees that there are a lot more guys there.
We get back in the car, and at this point I switch to winter boots. Practicality over cuteness. Plus, I really do hate wearing heals. We get to the bar, walk in, and it’s empty except for a bartender and a handful of women sitting by the window. Sally, Abby, and I sit around a table asking each other questions, and then they teach me how to play pool. It was a fun girls’ night out, but not a successful dating night out.
Now that I’m back, you all can expect to see more posts. They might be more sporadic though because interesting things have to happen. The next post is planned and will cover other Sally adventures, and my thoughts of how the dating scene would be better in other cities. Feel free to comment. Feel free to set me up on a date.
-SJ
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