It's 12:30am. I should be asleep. I would be if I wasn't such an insomniac. Instead I am writing this blog about my complete and utter misfortunes when it comes to dating. Really, this blog is giving me an excuse to write. I'm a writer by nature, and I don't have ideas fully developed to write a screenplay.
You may wonder how this blog idea all began. I've never been a dating girl. It just hasn't happened. There's probably a laundry list of reasons as to why, but I'll point out a few specifics. I often like guys who do not like me. Wow, that was blunt enough. I'm generally cynical about the entire concept of love. I often don't let people into my little world. If you get past my super tall protective wall, then you can count yourself among the lucky few. I set goals for myself in life and reach them, and maybe this is intimidating. Also, I have some health issues. Not many guys want to hang out with their girlfriend who is attached to an IV pole receiving a transfusion. I have a pretty good sense of humor about my health though. I definitely am not unattractive although I could go to the gym more. I have red hair and pale skin which doesn't fall into the tall, blond, and tan category.
Now that I've listed what is not working in my favor, I'll get to why things should go better for me in the dating world. I'm kind of a guy's girl. I generally "get" guys. I have a good sense of humor. I'm interested in a lot of things. I'm confident and have a self-esteem. I'm mostly always smiling. I'm kind to others. People generally find me interesting. This seems like a pathetic "in my favor list". Clearly, part of the problem.
A few days after Christmas I met up with one of my friends. We'll call her Sally. Sally at the time was going to be meeting up with a recently discovered guy from a certain dating website. For years I have balked at these websites. This fine few days after Christmas I was presented with a dating book gift -and a gift card to Sephora which I purchased red lipstick with. We went back to my house where she showed me the dating website. That's when she signed me up. Oh dear.
I knew from the beginning this would not go well. Did you hear that sound? It was the sound of my open mind closing. I don't understand the world of on-line dating. I've browsed the help articles, but they seem about as useful as dating articles filled with all sorts of wrong advice. I will take you through this on-line journey with me. It will not be a smooth journey. You've been warned.
In the past I have had pretty much three checks to my "I'm interested in you" list. These are blue/green eyes, brown hair, and a musician. This had to be expanded upon for on-line dating. In person you can tell someone's personality immediately, but that's not the case on-line. In general, I appreciate sane people. It's also good if they like their mom. I've found if guys dislike their mom, they are not someone I want to spend time with. I like people who are sarcastic. The expanded upon version is as follows.
In the on-line dating world, I will not respond to a message by:
*Someone who does not have their shirt on in their main picture. I really, really, really don't care about your abs. Really!
*Anyone who tells me I'm "hot" "hott" or "hawt" in their initial message.
*Too many typos (I will expand on this in another post).
*Any guy who lists "cuddling" as one of their interests. One - they lie! Two - their "cuddle" does not mean cuddle.
*Guys with kids. I'm not ready to be a potential step-mom.
*Anyone over 30.
Other than that... it's fair game. What have I gotten myself into?
-SJ
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